hackthis: Merlin - Happily Ever After, My Arse (Merlin/Arthur, PG-13)
http://hackthis.livejournal.com/515184.html

Arthur hadn't heard the bit about the coin before. His destiny had always been about leadership and making sure to not let any of his knights bed his queen, which, if his queen was supposed to be Merlin, was most definitely never going to be in the cards.

" The destiny bit needed clarification. "This destiny bit needs clarification," Arthur said to the dragon once he and Merlin had returned from that whole dragon-slaying, rescuing Merlin-in-distress business. If the dragon was pleased to see them together, he didn't show it. "Yes," Merlin agreed. "Are we destined to be together -- or just, you know, destined to drive each other mad?""

The first time the dragon told Arthur his destiny was some idiot named Merlin, Arthur laughed. Loudly. And at length.

The first time the dragon told Arthur his destiny was some idiot named Merlin, Arthur laughed. Loudly. And at length. And it had nothing to do with the blow to the head he'd received from that poncy git, Lucan. Arthur's back had been turned for a start, which was why Lucan was in the dungeon and Arthur was talking to a bloody great big dragon.

[merlin. cracky. pg-13. merlin/arthur.] The first time the dragon told Arthur his destiny was some idiot named Merlin, Arthur laughed. Loudly. And at length.

"That's hardly the same thing!" Arthur shouted. "He's a buggering warlock," he said to the dragon. // The dragon's lips curled. "I know."

"The first time the dragon told Arthur his destiny was some idiot named Merlin, Arthur laughed. Loudly. And at length." Hilarious! They've got a destiny but no one said it would be smooth sailing. And the dragon is no help at all.

Arthur learns that Merlin is his destiny - worst destiny *ever*.

IT'S A REAL FANDOM, FRONT PAGE OF DELICIOUS BABY

modern!day London AU's

ModerndayLondonAU. // "I can't be late," Arthur says in his best Merlin impression. "I've got an important meeting. I'll do the washing up and lick your trainers clean if you do this for me. I'll tell everyone you're brilliant in bed." "You're a prick," Merlin retorts. "And I don't recall that last one." Arthur shrugs. "You said it," he insists before turning on his heel. "I've got it recorded on my mobile. Maybe I'll make it my new ringtone." Merlin's still sputtering as Arthur walks out, pausing to turn on Radio 1. Merlin hates Radio 1; he'll be forced to get up just to turn it off. "It doesn't count if I was pissed," Merlin hollers over Lily Allen. "Yes, Merlin," Arthur calls back. "It does."

Merlin sleeps like the dead. A dead octopus that is. His arms splay out across the mattress as though he's embracing a vast mountain terrain in his sleep, and his hips shift, spreading out his legs as though they're the bottom half of a lower-case 'h'.

Merlin sleeps like the dead. A dead octopus that is.

modern!day London AU

In the six-plus years that Arthur's known Merlin -– three at Cambridge, one of Merlin travelling the world and "finding himself", the six months Merlin spent on Arthur's sofa doing fuck all, and the two years that Merlin's actually been employed at Pendragon Creative -– Arthur has never known Merlin to take his tea black. Today, however, Arthur winds up pouring Merlin's milk on the counter, because Merlin snatches his mug away before Arthur's had a chance to finish making the tea.

modern au

Pendragon Creative, Inc is the largest public relations conglomerate in the United Kingdom

Modern!AU in London. Merlin is a web designer for Pendragon Creative, Inc., and has been friends with Arthur for years. Arthur doesn't want to ruin their friendship.

Morgana sighs dramatically. "Are you still harping on about 'ruining your friendship with your magnificent sex'? My god, you sound like an old woman. Allow me to enlighten you based on what I've heard – you're not that good a shag, Arthur. Merlin won't wait on you forever."

Arthur's knights have a great fondness for the term 'cocksucker.' [3,900]

Merlin's hair is a riotous brown mess on his head, which Arthur only notices when Merlin is on his knees before him or when Arthur is watching Merlin from across the room. There could be hundreds of pale, scrawny manservants with piercing blue eyes in all of Camelot, and Arthur would be able to pick out Merlin by his unruly hair alone.

Perhaps Merlin is an infectious disease, and Arthur has no hope of cure.

"In a little under a year, Merlin has become irreplaceable, and if Merlin dies for want of Arthur at his side, Arthur would never be able to live with himself." Arthur gets a tad distracted.

Arthur's knights have a great fondness for the term 'cocksucker.'

Arthur keeps thinking about Merlin, and it doesn't go the way he wants it to go. He's just concerned about Merlin's welfare, that's all.

"Arthur will not even address the matter of Merlin's absurd cheekbones. Perhaps if Merlin actually ate something they would be less pronounced. Perhaps Arthur should tie Merlin down and -- this line of reasoning doesn't seem to be going where it should." Arthur muses on Merlin.

Arthur will not even address the matter of Merlin's absurd cheekbones. Perhaps if Merlin actually ate something they would be less pronounced. Perhaps Arthur should tie Merlin down and -- this line of reasoning doesn't seem to be going where it should.