The Referendum - Happy Days Blog - NYTimes.com
http://happydays.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/09/17/the-referendum/

very well-written article by Tim Kreider on using alternate life paths as a way of gauging and judging the choices we have made.

Most of my married friends now have children, the rewards of which appear to be exclusively intangible and, like the mysteries of some gnostic sect, incommunicable to outsiders. In fact it seems from the outside as if these people have joined a dubious cult: they claim to be much happier and more fulfilled than ever before, even though they live in conditions of appalling filth and degradation, deprived of the most basic freedoms and dignity, and owe unquestioning obedience to a capricious and demented master.

on how people judge others out of jealousy or fear, and on the different choices we all make, and on how one choice cancels out other choices and on how that's hard. See comments for great discussion.